Culinary school quotes of the week, Week 10

Call my lawyer
"You don't want egg shells in your pasta. What's that going to do? Probably get you into small claims court."
-- Chef Dan Fluharty (right, with pasta) as he pulled a small piece of shell from the mix in a pasta-making demo.

Call 911
"I had a knife emergency."
-- Culinary student Aline Brown explaining why her pommes duchesse overcooked. She dropped her chef's knife, bending its point and having to work it back to sharpness. All the while, her potatoes were in the oven, getting browner and browner ... 

Call the seasoning police
" It was 'just' beans and rice. But it goes to show you the importance of good seasoning."
-- Chef Dan Fluharty revealing that in another class, students neglected proper seasoning because they thought the food was too basic for it.

Call an audible
"I'm sticking with aioli. Hollandaise is too much pressure."

-- Culinary student John Briggs (left) after I said I would make hollandaise sauce to go with my artichoke for our competency exam. Despite making hollandaise successfully in practice, I decided at the last minute to go with the relatively easier-to-make aioli.
Call the doctor
"Lola's pans had butcher twine wrapped tightly around the handles. The dishwashers knew never to wash those pans or Lola would come apply those pans to the sides of their heads."
-- Chef Dan Fluharty on how a breakfast cook he knew cared for her egg pans, seasoning with salt, a little oil, a little heat and a lot of towel massaging rather than applying soap and water.